In which I decide to prattle on about my idiosyncrasies

I suppose this could alternately be titled The Shit That Makes People Think I’m Crazy, but I wanted an excuse to use the word prattle. (Also, you’ll have to excuse the gap in between entries/post/whatever. I haven’t blogged on the regular in a long time and I’m still trying to remember that I started this, so bear with me.)


I got to thinking tonight (as I sat here playing Bejeweled for most of the beginning of my shift) about some of the things about myself that seem to make other people think I’m a bit… Off, I guess. Actually, I was sitting here playing Bejeweled and was attacked by a Box Elder bug, which got me to wondering about why my boss would keep the window with out the screen on it open all day, knowing that I was to be her replacement tonight and that bugs of all kinds have the strictest of orders to kill me on sight and THAT’S what got me to thinking about the odd shit about me that makes people cross to the other side of the street when they see me walking towards them. I then managed to kill the stupid bug (no, seriously. I smacked the shit out of it with a fly swatter and damned near had a heart attack when the bug stuck to the fly swatter and managed to get me to fling it’s nasty bug carcass at MYSELF. Fo realz, yo.) and forgot all about my train of thought cuzz Bejeweled had begun to drain my will to live once again. A few hours passed and I sent my crews out on a couple calls. When the one crew returned, I was once again reminded about all the things that make other people wonder how the hell I’ve managed to be so freaking awesome while being so much of a… Well, FREAK, for lack of a better term.

Ok, here’s some things that should get across what I’m talking about. I hate to breathe other people’s breath. (Incidentally, that’s exactly what got me to thinking about my idiosyncrasies when my crew returned.) I absolutely, 100% can not handle other people breathing their breath all my face. I refuse to sleep facing anyone and even get a little freaked out when one of my cats decides to fall asleep with their face near mine. *shudder*

I also have issues with the way certain words sound and will go out of my way to never, ever use them. Meal. Moist. Tasty. Crisp. (There are TONS more, but I’ll stop there or else the rest of this entry will be nothing but words I loathe.) There is absolutely no reason for me to hate these words. They’ve never done a damned thing to me. I just cannot stand the way the sound and the way they feel in my mouth, if that makes any sense. When Couch Greg was still living with us, he used to say tasty ALL.THE.TIME. and it drove me nuts! Every time he said it, I wanted to punch him in the throat. I restrained myself, though. After all, it’s not like I had told him that I hated the word, so he really had no idea that he was pissing me off. And even if I had clued him in? Who am I to tell him not to use a word. Ok, ok, so it was my home and I could have totally went into super-bitch mode and gave him a list of words to never say in my home. Thing is, I can’t let all the crazy out at once. I have to let it seep out slowly, so as not to frighten the natives. Namely Greg and everyone around me who happens to NOT be crazy. No, my cats do not count. Each one is just as fucked up in the head as I am.

It also drives me nuts if I have to divert from certain routines I have, though that might be more of an OCD thing rather than just an eccentric-crazy-lady thing. (Cuzz eccentric is the word you want to use when you’re being polite or trying not to get the crazy lady to kick your ass.) Example? When I take showers, I do everything in the exact same order every single time. (Wash hair, rinse, conditioner, wash self, rinse hair and self, shave anything that needs shaved, wash face.) Always in the same order, no exceptions. If I manage to get out-of-order, I’m screwed for the entire day. Like the day that I woke up late and couldn’t remember if I had just gotten my hair wet or if I had forgotten to rinse out the conditioner. (Smell analysis determined I forgot to rinse out the conditioner, thankfully, cuzz I’d have just felt disgusting if I had forgotten to wash my hair.) (My hair gets really nasty greasy if it’s not washed every day, so it would have been gross. Trust me.) I was all sorts of screwed that day. I couldn’t keep my appts in order, I kept forgetting where people were… If I had remembered to rinse out the conditioner and not managed to divert from my normal shower routine, I’m sure I would have had a nicely pleasant day.

Hmm… Let’s go with one more thing and then I’ll put an end to the drivel in this post.

I cannot stand hearing two things running at the same time. Like, the radio and the TV. It MUST be one or the other, never both. That goes for video and/or computer games and things of that nature. If the TV (or radio) is on and something else is going at the same time, I come insanely close to flipping my shit entirely. BUT! Even though I can’t stand it when two things are on at the same time, I absolutely cannot stand the absolute quiet even more. There has to be noise of some kind going at all times. As a matter of fact, up until I met Greg (boyfriend Greg, not to be confused with Couch Greg), I couldn’t go to sleep with out the radio going.

So, there are some of the things that make me uniquely myself. Or, so as to not sound so trendy or whatever, some of the things about myself that make other people wonder how I’m not hated or getting my ass kicked on the daily. Now tell me, internets, what are some of the things about YOU that people may view as a tad eccentric? (See what I did there with the being polite and what not? That right there makes me CLASSY.)

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