The Things That Wander Through My Mind When I’m Actually Alone

It’s not often I find myself without anyone around me.  Seriously, there’s always someone near me.  More often than not, it happens to be a child.  Since Miss Squish has decided that 0400 is a wonderful time to wake me up in the mornings again, I have a feeling that I might be venturing outside earlier and earlier in the mornings.  I set my alarm for 0530 so I can get up and attempt that C25K thing (which I’ve had to alter and will explain), but for the last couple of weeks, the 3 year old has been all about waking me up at 0400.  This morning, she was thirsty, but she had drunk all the water I had given her when she went to bed.  Of course, when I returned with more water, she was already sleeping again.  I tried to follow suit, but failed.  So I got up and ventured out into the world.  While I was out, I began to realize a few things. 

~ Britney Spears keeps me moving.  Seriously.  I don’t know what it is, but if I listen to her music while I’m attempting to defeat the Dispatch Ass®, I actually feel motivated to push farther.  I’ve decided that it’s my body’s natural response to escape Britney, which totally allows me to keep my metal cred. 

~ I need to ease into the C25K thing more slowly, which scares me a little.  I didn’t realize that my lung capacity had diminished as much as it has.  I mean, I probably should have known, but it just never occurred to me.  I’ve got asthma and smoked for damned near 20 years on top of that, so DUH! but it honestly just never crossed my mind.  Probably cuzz I never had a smoker’s cough, but who knows?  Hopefully, by easing myself into it slower than when I had intended, I’ll be able to actually complete the thing without feeling like my lungs are full of cement.  

~ I really hate cleaning.  Completely despise it in fact.  This means that I need to play the lottery.  When I win, I’ll hire all kinds of people to clean and stuff, which will create jobs and help the economy.  That’s right, I’m a problem solver. 

~ I need to find a way to get a house.  There are too many kids here for this place and I’d to have a yard.  With a fence.  That way, the kids can run around and I won’t have to worry about them deciding that today is the day to test whether they are stronger than the car barreling down the street.  Also, a bigger place might allow me to start collecting cats again.  Maybe.  Except probably not, cuzz they’ll all flock to my husband, like the traitorous bitches they are.  Damn his cat whispering ways!

And there you have it.  That’s the kind of shit I think about when I’m not surrounded by other humans.  Now I’m off to grab up Little Bitty and see what the day holds.  Likely a bunch of screaming and tears, followed by wailing meows from cats who think that they need to eat deli meat.  

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